But I think, by the end of the honeymoon,  不过我觉得到了蜜月尾声
we really started to feel like a married couple.  我们真的开始有已婚夫妇感了
But the good kind, like on TV,  是好的那种  像电视里那样
- not like my parents. - Yeah.  -不是像我父母  -是的
You're not a real married couple until you can pee  真正的夫妻是当你可以撒尿不关门
with the door open and she's okay with it.  而你老婆也无所谓时才算
I told you, I'm not okay with it.  我跟你说过我有所谓
She loves it.  她爱死了
So, we got everybody gifts.  我们给大家都买了礼物
Did you forget about us until you were at the airport?  你们是不是到机场了才想起我们啊
No.  才不是
We forgot about you until we were on the plane.  我们是到飞机上了才想起你们来
Luckily, there was Wi-Fi,  幸好飞机上有无线网
and I have Amazon Prime.  而我有网络商城高速送货服务
I heart New York.  我❤纽约
Aw, the baby's gonna love throwing up on this.  宝宝一定会很喜欢吐在这上面
Look, it doesn't have to just be New York.  听我说  这不见得只能代表纽约啊
That's the beauty of it.  这才是其中的奥妙之处
Uh, the initials "N.Y." can stand for anything you like.  这个缩写可以代表很多你们喜爱的事物
For instance, I understand that there is  举个例子  我听说有一个
an elderly rock-and-roll musician named Neil Young.  知名的老年摇滚歌手尼尔·杨
Perhaps you heart him.  或许你们喜欢他啊
Or if not him, Egyptian table tennis silver medalist  如果对他无感  埃及银牌乒乓球手
Noha Yossry.  诺哈·亚瑟里
Or Nana Yamaguchi,  也可以是山口奈奈
the Japanese voice actress  她是日本的女声优
who starred in Sally the Witch.  曾给卡通《仙女下凡》配过音
Did you just Google the initials "N.Y."?  你上网查了有谁缩写是N.Y.的吗
I had Wi-Fi and a long plane flight.  飞行时间长而又刚好有网
Draw your own conclusions.  你推理推理吧
Well, guys, that was very, very thoughtful of you. I...  两位  这礼物真是非常有心了  我...
Did you get me a double XL?  你们给我买了XXL号的吗
- I told you. - You were right, dear.  -我跟你说太大了吧  -你说对了  亲爱的
Sheldon, that's not how you write a thank you card.  谢尔顿  感谢函不是这么写的
What's wrong with it?  我写的有哪里不对
"Dear Aunt Helen,  "亲爱的海伦阿姨
Thank you so much for the lovely place setting.  谢谢您送给我们的这套令人喜爱的餐具
If my handwriting looks strained,  如果我的字迹看起来不太自然
that is because this is the 16th thank you card  那是因为这是我被艾米逼着写的
Amy has forced me to write.  第16张感谢函
The muscles in my wrist are cramping  我忍着用肌肉在抽筋的手腕
as I struggle to finish this sentence.  艰苦地写完这句子
Ow, ow, oh, the pain.  哎哟  哎哟  疼死我了
Love, Sheldon."  爱你的谢尔顿敬上"
Fine.  行行行
"And Amy."  "谢尔顿与艾米敬上"
This one is from Leonard and Penny.  这份礼物是莱纳德与佩妮送的
"The perfect gift for the perfect couple."  "完美的礼物赠于最完美的夫妇"
Save that card. We may need to throw it back in their faces.  卡先留着  礼物不满意就把卡甩回他们脸上
I wonder what it could be.  我真好奇会是什么东西
Oh, could be anything.  什么东西都有可能nice是什么中文意思
A flute, a letter opener,  一支长笛  一把拆信刀
one of those pens  或是带裸女图的笔
where you put the bikini back on the naked lady.  把笔正着拿  墨水就会变成遮羞的比基尼
Isn't this nice?  这东西不错啊
What is it?  这是什么
You know, it's, uh,  你懂的  就是...
it's one   就是那个...
Nope, doesn't do that.  不是  没作用
Oh, maybe it's candy.  或许是糖果
Lick it.  舔舔看
I don't want to lick it. You lick it.  我才不要舔  你舔吧
I'm not gonna lick it. I just brushed my teeth.  我才不要舔  我刚刷完牙
Is it from one of your dumb sci-fi shows?  是你看的科幻电视剧里的东西吗
Uh, none of the sci-fi shows I watch are dumb.  我看的科幻电视剧都不好吗
- - Okay, Westworld.  -谢尔顿少来  -好啦  《西部世界》
But this has nothing to do with that show,  但这跟那部剧没有任何关联啊
other than it's also inexplicable.  唯一的关联大概就是都令人懵逼
Well, Leonard and Penny are our best friends.  莱纳德与佩妮是我们最好的朋友
They know us better than anyone.  他们比谁都了解我们俩
They said it's the perfect gift.  他们说这是完美的礼物
We must be missing something.  那我们肯定是漏了什么细节
You   你不会...
think it's a marital aid, do you?  觉得这是婚姻"辅助棒"吧
Don't be silly.  别犯傻了
Amy, how is this big glass shaft going to aid our marriage?  艾米  这根玻璃大棒哪里能辅助我们的婚姻啊
Do you think when Krypto the Superdog is out flying,  你觉得当超级狗英雄在外面乱飞时
Superman has to fly after him with a little baggie?  超人得拿着捡屎袋跟在它后面吗
Hmm. Haven't really thought about it before.  这点以前我还真没想过
But he doesn't need a baggie,  但超人应该不需要用捡屎袋
because he just blasts the poop with his heat vision.  他可以直接用热能光线把屎给炸了
You've thought about it before.  你以前绝对想过这件事
Oh, I've thought about it a lot.  其实我可常想了
What is wrong with Stuart's face?  斯图尔特的脸出了什么问题
I think he's smiling.  他好像是在微笑
Oh, my God, are they flirting?  天啊  他们是在聊骚吗
Oh, they're way past flirting.  他们早就过了聊骚期
I caught them making out at Sheldon's wedding.  我抓到他们在谢尔顿的婚礼上亲热了
Are you sure she wasn't trying to breathe life back into him?  你确定她不是在帮他做人工呼吸吗
I don't think so.  应该不是